Attack-A-Snak by Kerry Foods

I’ve never really understood the fashion for these build-your-own snacks.  The Lunchables brand – in the UK – dominates the market and is produced by Dairylea; the company that brought you spreadable cheese in triangle form and in a pot too.  Have a look at their tasty timeline which I found on their website and flinch at the overuse of the word ‘yummy’.

Regardless, my favourite shop in the entire world ever ever – Poundland – stocks Kerry Food’s badly named Attack-A-Snak, with a USP that they use a wrap instead of a dry miserable cracker.  This is great for those of us who like wraps, and given it is a snack that you build yourself, is open to great degrees of customisation.

So what do you get in your DIY Snack box?

Two Tortilla Wraps – These are both rather thick, not particularly floury or overly fresh.

Two pieces of meat – On the ingredients list, this is Pork Leg. I admire Kerry Foods for actually telling us what the meat is from and which part of the animal it was from too, kudos.

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A Cheese String – Loosely based on cheese, this stuff is coloured with the same chemical that they use in fake tans…I think? Once this was cheese, but now it is but a chemical oddity declared fit for human consumption.

There are two ways of eating your Attack-a-Snak. Firstly you can construct it and eat it fresh from the pack.  This way you get to savour the aroma of ‘Cheese’ and the watery juices of the ham as they combine in your mouth to give you a palid representation of ham and cheese.  The second method, which the pack instructs, is to warm up your wraps in the microwave, letting the cheese melt a bit and giving you that ‘fresh from the café’ feeling.  Not only would you most probably burn your mouth, but you also the knowledge that you’ve paid £1.00 for the experience.

Although the list of ingredients, chemicals and unknown substances really made my eyes water (most probably because they were written in tiny text and I was not wearing my glasses), it didn’t taste too bad.  It was edible and is the first product on the blog that gets my Edible Award.

But giving this sort of product to your child might cause it to grow tentacles or develop a serious addiction to Cheese Strings.

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